What do you call 3 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start! You get the idea. Ever since I wrote this song, people tell me their lawyer jokes. I think I am going to start a blog and ask people to post their lawyer jokes at my blog. Or, hey, just post them here in the comments section. LAWYER MAN music and lyrics copyright 2004 by Stephen J. Deasy Sing a song about the lawyer man He’ll take your money any way he can Hes chasin’ after your ambulance Hes takin’ half of your inheritance Driving up in a Mercedes Benz Hell pretend that youre the best of friends But keep your guard up, be forewarned Love hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned Two farmers fight about a cow Ones got the head, ones got the tail But our good old friend the lawyer He milks the cow and steals the pail Its a mystery to me Dont understand the way he think How come he can join the bar But Im the one who needs a drink? Its like hes guided by some unknown force Towards catastrophes and my divorce Just when you think your life is a curse Youre called to court and find it can get worse Not all attorneys are bad, its said Its been pointed out to me that some are dead So dont go thinking that theyre all to blame Its just the ninety-nine percent that give the rest a bad name Youre stranded with a lawyer, Mussolini, and Adolf Hitler too But youve only got two bullets So what the hell you gonna do? Its an ethical dilemma So you best take my advice Let two of them go Shoot the lawyer twice Little …

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